Sigh
So last night after checking some email, I took a shower and grabbed my alternate.
Husband was far too into another project last night to unwind with me, so I granted him a pardon.
Alternate was a bad boy. I was disappointed.
Shit I must've worked that thing for atleast 45 minutes without achieving one good, strong orgasm. As I was washing him up I told him how shitty he'd performed.... bastard.
I also let him know he's easily replaceable, even in more fashionable colors, and with more than two settings, thank you. Stupid, fucking thing...
I finally went to bed more frustrated than when I started.
This set the tone for my whole Saturday though, I was exhausted from staying up entirely too late (for apparently no good reason). So I was a bitch about half the day... mellowed out for the rest. I have this birthday party for one of my kids tomorrow, he'll be three... and he's chock-full of energy that one. Today was a big house cleaning, grocery shopping day.
It's amazing the things you see at the grocery store, isn't it? Especially the people you see. Example, today I saw a hunched over 80 year old woman walking slowly through the produce section...
No, no cucumbers for me... but apparently this woman needed one... or five. Her cart had 4 gallons of milk, 5 cucumbers, and 10 boxes of Massengill douche. Perhaps she was having a wild evening tonight? I dunno. After choice picking her victims from the veggie section she hobbled towards the check-out with her goods. You have to wonder about those kinds of people... sure she likes milk, and maybe the home provides salad, but not cucumbers...so she brings her own? But what in gods name could she need 10 boxes of douche for?
Okay, or she takes a milk bath and gets off with a cucumber every night for a week, then to undo the process she douches twice a day....
I know, it's not a pretty picture... because she's 80? Or because it's just a sick thought in general?
If I were taking a milk bath and getting off with a cucumber would it make it just that much more appetizing.
We're not going anywhere with this, are we? "This is what happens when you get tired Clark, you get weird...." (who can guess which movie that qoute is from)?
Tonight, tonight I am going to get some beauty sleep. The brother in law is staying with us, the boys are out for drinks.. I offered to stay so they could go unwind and talk women.
I'm going to listen to some music, and play my bass softly...
Husband was far too into another project last night to unwind with me, so I granted him a pardon.
Alternate was a bad boy. I was disappointed.
Shit I must've worked that thing for atleast 45 minutes without achieving one good, strong orgasm. As I was washing him up I told him how shitty he'd performed.... bastard.
I also let him know he's easily replaceable, even in more fashionable colors, and with more than two settings, thank you. Stupid, fucking thing...
I finally went to bed more frustrated than when I started.
This set the tone for my whole Saturday though, I was exhausted from staying up entirely too late (for apparently no good reason). So I was a bitch about half the day... mellowed out for the rest. I have this birthday party for one of my kids tomorrow, he'll be three... and he's chock-full of energy that one. Today was a big house cleaning, grocery shopping day.
It's amazing the things you see at the grocery store, isn't it? Especially the people you see. Example, today I saw a hunched over 80 year old woman walking slowly through the produce section...
No, no cucumbers for me... but apparently this woman needed one... or five. Her cart had 4 gallons of milk, 5 cucumbers, and 10 boxes of Massengill douche. Perhaps she was having a wild evening tonight? I dunno. After choice picking her victims from the veggie section she hobbled towards the check-out with her goods. You have to wonder about those kinds of people... sure she likes milk, and maybe the home provides salad, but not cucumbers...so she brings her own? But what in gods name could she need 10 boxes of douche for?
Okay, or she takes a milk bath and gets off with a cucumber every night for a week, then to undo the process she douches twice a day....
I know, it's not a pretty picture... because she's 80? Or because it's just a sick thought in general?
If I were taking a milk bath and getting off with a cucumber would it make it just that much more appetizing.
We're not going anywhere with this, are we? "This is what happens when you get tired Clark, you get weird...." (who can guess which movie that qoute is from)?
Tonight, tonight I am going to get some beauty sleep. The brother in law is staying with us, the boys are out for drinks.. I offered to stay so they could go unwind and talk women.
I'm going to listen to some music, and play my bass softly...
posted by Everything Nice at 8:40 PM
1 Comments:
Your story of the cuke lady brought back a memory... Working as a "bag boy" at a local chain grocery store, I once had a regular customer that bought several containers of the largest size plain unflavored yogurt each week. I used to wonder why someone would buy so much of that stuff... thought it'd taste pretty gross.
Then I heard someone mention unflavored yogurt could be used as a homemade remedy for curing yeast infections.
She was a pretty hefty gal, well over two hundo, and I figured thereafter she must've had a pretty persistent problem in that area.
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