Rainbows and Daisies?!?!?! Where?!?!
What with EN being in a psycho momentus phase in her life I suppose once the funeral is over on Thursday she'll be back to being the goddess she is, and I don't know about you but I can't wait for this whole dark phase to be over with either of us. We just have to wait it out is all, in the meantime I think we both agree that we appreciate you just reading this turmoil and leaving good comments and happy thoughts while we work to support each other with help from our families... boo hoo. Frankly, we're quite a pair what with her newly gained alcoholism and my pharmacuetical coma.
We did get a chance to bury the hatchet today, so it's all good. After reading Sassinaks comments (and corresponding comments therein), it was agreed on both our parts that we should hate the universe and not each other. Thanks Sassinak for that, it meant the world to our perspective.
Alright, what else... my leg seems to be a chick magnet, so I will prey to the Gods that my dick heals before my leg does.
"What did you do to your leg?"
"Oh my god you jumped OUT of a MOVING car?!?!"
"You poor thing, does it hurt much?"
I love the ditzy women that think I'm brave for ditching a fast moving vehicle. I have all of them fooled. I am actually an underachiever that feared marriage... I wonder what the reaction would be if I told them that instead? Nahhh.
I got two phone numbers, they know nothing about my genital incapacitation and we'll keep it that way. Everytime they peep my bulging crotch they think I'm hung like a quarter horse. I love it!!! I commend myself to believing that I can convince them I'm being sincere by 'holding out' until the second or third date while I get right with my phallicy.
They find it respectable.
I think it will allow me to let my dick heal and get laid PLUS a bonus halo for the ladies because they'll think Im not a slut because I pressured them on the first date.
Also I was fondled by a nurse when I went in for my pre-op appointment. At first I thought she was doing her routine check up, but she looked at me all funny and giggled. Do women thrive on injured men? Is this some sort of deep seeded Nurse Nancy complex? Is it sexy and just the most ultimate turn on to see us injured?
It may be just my imagination but I've gotten more attention since my accident than I have my whole life.
In other news I watched a guy kiss his dog today, and the dogs tongue got all in his mouth, then he kissed his girlfriend. Five minutes before that I watched the dog take a shit at a nearby bush and lick his ass after.
I appreciate dog lovers just as much as the next person, but I don't think his girl is realizing that she just kissed a dogs asshole.
Any thoughts on that?
Okay so hopefully EN will be out of the bottle and be back to this blog tomorrow so you all will be spared from my patheticness, I'm just trying to help out a friend here!!! Surgery tomorrow and I've gone 7 hours with nothing but sips of water!
posted by Editor Shawn at 8:15 PM
42 Comments:
Sassinak, I responded to your comment on the other post AND I got a picture up on the blog!!
Do you think I've earned a gold star?
I'm off to bed for my big day tomorrow!!!
Emma hope you are having a decent evening and all is well with the family. I'll see you tomorrow morning... 5am Sunshine!!! Try not to be hung over.
shawn i was just going to check those comments you know that? :)
i'm really proud of you and em, y'all are being grown ups which is extra hard at times like this *huggs* k?
i think you get a gold star +2 for being brave about your dick.
and em gets a gold star +4 cause well she's em and uh yeah i want to let her sit on my lap. *grin*
g'luck with your surgery... hope all goes well!
and you're welcome, glad i could help. really. (i have little shine in my eyes...)
er A little
punk: can't.
i HATE when i make typos. hee three in the word hate alone *g*
Wow so you are using a Fallacy while healing your phallicy.
How very...male of you.
Good Luck.
oh madame
i adore you.
i'd much rather have alcoholism than dick surgery.
Thanks Sass! I think you're pretty neat too!
Scum I know many people who should have dick sugery to remove the dick from their personality's.
PRESENT COMPANY EXCLUDED of course!!!
You guys and gals are a hoot.
Hi, I'm Emma and apparently I'm an alcoholic... No worries though, I get all warm and lovey.
AWWWW!!! Gold stars!!!
Okay so I dropped Shawn off at the hospital and waited until they came and got him for the prep. You should have seen his face!!!
I made some shitty joke to the nurse about 'the sex change'... There will be more on that tomorrow.
WTF is that a picture of?
A guy wrestling a giant shrimp?
What the FUCK are you talking about madame LOL!!!
OH well to me it looks like somebody wearing bomb squad armor trying to diffuse a bomb, and another guy standing behind him with a paper bag about to pop it.
Which, in fact is indicative of how our relationship has been from the beginning so yeah, that picture was a perfect choice :)
yay shawn!! You should be just about going under right now :)
But aren't they in water?
NO!
It's sand!!!!
I see the picture now.
OK...got it!
No, that would be sand.
Holy fuck, am I still drunk and you're seeing this correctly?
We need a third opinion... because I may still be intoxicated.
it's sand drunky. madame's right.
Quit pickin on me asshole or I'll fuck you with PBC's dick.
I'm with scum... I'd rather be an alcoholic too.
*virtual boobie nuzzles and hot pockets*
xoxox
ugh ... hot pockets? unless that's some new sex euphemism the kids are using these days.
i'm way too awake for 1:40 a.m. ... anyone wanna sing me a lullabye?
You guys must be new around here so let me clarify...
the *boobie nuzzles* are for Em
the *hot pockets* are for Shawn
anyone who's been around here a while gets it and doesn't need an explanation.
wow ... you really ARE sullen ... LOL
didn't mean to come across as harsh mr. dzer. all apologies to you :)
she's sullen as fuck yo.
No matter how tasty it may be at the time never ever eat an entire brick of sharp cheddar cheese in one seating...just saying
mmmmmm..... cheese
Madame - you may never poop again!
I know!
*said in a high squeeky voice*
nothing to make you feel old like being called "Mr. DZER" ... good ol' Mr. DZER ... soon it'll be Ol' Man DZER ... *sighs*
Damn Em. Best wishes & prayers to you & yours
HH
God, I guess I can't say anything right today. WTF?
*this 32 year old sighs back*
I'm a dog lover....but that's just nasty!
I think the injured man thing makes them more vulnerable...looking. That's what attracts most women. Me...on the other hand...I just think their pussies!
The package in your pants would get my attention...but I would probably ask you how many pairs of socks it took to get it. I'm silly like that!
Isn't that a picture of the devil spawn egg you laid Emma? They dug it up...your screwed now!!
i still like you sullen, even if ol' man dzer doesn't!
thanx scum :)
*kisses and beezos*
K first, Cheese. I like cheese... Muenster is my favorite. And I normally counter it with something high in fiber.... like plums.
Please share your cheese madame :)
Sullen - No worries, it's hard to get across anything in type the right way....
D - You're not old, and I like to call you Mr.... Sometimes I scream it in the sack... "MISTER D, MISTER D!!!"
Mimi - Hehehe, you can take whatever you want to your meeting. Just let me know what the support group says... It may help me too.
Scum - We need quiet time in the romper room. And we need to discuss the unburial of our demon spawn and what this means to the future of our planet....
Tumbleweed - Happy after birthday to you, I say we injure all men just a little...
And you better watch out, Im sending one of those horny devils your way!!!
Okay really the above kinda sounded like a whole bunch of blow smoke up your ass bullshit and I'm sorry.
I'm reaching to be cordial... but it's not working is it?
jesus... I NEED A HUG!!!
OH and HH, thanks buddy... you and Sassinak are such a foundation I can't tell you.
I'm tired of burying people.
*tear*
{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}
*waves*
*sends good vibes :)*
Blogger ate my first comment :( So, I sent you an email instead.
*endless hugs and tissues*
Love you girl :x
You may be a marvelously hot woman with a wildly erotic brain, and people might blush when they shake hands with you knowing what you give Shawn a prostate orgasm if he really needed it, but that doesn't mean you don't need hugs, or deserve them. Here's one from me, Emma. (Mwah!)
I doubt anyone wants to hear about my testicle surgery again, and it's too late to mention it to Shawn, but you haven't lived till you've had your cock and balls prepped for surgery after they've started the valium drip. There were three attending nurses and somewhere in the back of my mind I really cared whether it was one of the two very cute women or the one kind of dumpy-looking guy, and I couldn't see anything because they'd already draped me all up with sheets, but whoever it was did a *marvelous* job. It wasn't any kind of sexy or rocks-off thing, but man it felt great!
Since I don't have the enzyme that lets you metabolize alcohol I'm not the person to ask, but I got too many old friends who spend a lot of time meetings to like alcoholic jokes. (Ok, except one: Q: What's the difference between a drunk and an alcoholic? A: Us drunks don't have to go to all them damn meetings. Kada-boom.)
Take care of each other.
figleaf
*HUGS* I hope things are getting a little better for you today!!! You probably been told this a thousand times but it is a healing process and in time you will be able to cope and deal with it. It just takes time!!!
Sending you my best wishes :))
Okay. I've been gone from here for way too long. If I had commented more perhaps Emma could have held things together a bit better.
Shawn - good writing man. I didn't know you had joined this site. I'm glad to have a male perspective on board but please, no HNT pics from you ok? Thanks.
Emma - I've been way too busy getting my life in order but that's no excuse for not finding the time to stop by and say hi. You've always been very kind to me and you probably know that my feelings toward you go deeper than my carnal lust for you. Take care of yourself, shake the shadows from your mind and know that there are people that love and care about you.
um i object
*i* want hnt pics of shawn. well i think. is he hot? cute? repulsive? :)
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