Yesterday

I was having a pretty good day yesterday. For a Friday the office was fairly slow and I was getting shit done. I woke up with a good attitude and all was going nicely. Until around 1pm when I receive a call from my husband. "Hey" he gasped into the cell phone, walking quickly "It sounds like you're having a pretty good day."
"I am" I replied "finally."
"Well..." He pants on, his voice becoming a bit stressed "I would hate to ruin it for you."
"Why?" I could feel the pit of intuition in my stomach churn "Is it the kids?"
He chuckles nervously and continues "Guess who I just got a call from..."

Of course I wished he hadn't asked me that, since really I was terrible at this game and just wanted him to say it... "Uh, I dunno. Is it bad? Is it the kids?"

Good ol husband recants, still walking furiously... I can hear the tap tap of his wing tips on the sidewalk as he scurries. "Nope, no the kids are fine."

"Well, what is it then and where are you going." I am growing more nervous, but a bit relieved that my children were safe. Something about his tone wasn't right, and I couldn't wait for him to just blurt it... Then he did.

"I just got a call from the police department." I sit in silence, curious. He continues again "Apparently they caught some punks with a shitload of stolen items, one had my business card in it... It's my laptop. Our house has been broken into and a lot of our shit has been stolen."

I still sit. Stunned silence this time. He goes on to add "We need to get to the house right now, the police will be there waiting for us. They're going to process the scene."
"Are they at our house right now?"
"Yes."
"Fuck."
"Okay Hun, I'm outta here." And with that I conveniently forget about the days meetings and duties as I fly out the door, spitting the reason for my absence to a co-worker and apologizing. I run to the car and my phone rings... "Hey, can you just meet me downtown and take me home?"
Poor husband. He's a slave to the metro, which in mid-day only comes around every 55 minutes; sure being a bus commuter is conscientious.. But terribly inconvenient for emergencies like this. "Yes honey, I'll be there in a short... Head for the waterfront, I'll meet you there."

Most of you have been in an emergency situation. Ever notice how when you really need to get somewhere traffic slows, every dumbass going under the speed limit, does? Time goes faster and you wish you could just GET THERE. Husband and I experienced this fact as we raced 30 miles south to our violated residence. Not knowing the outcome once we arrive. What did they take... Did they break anything... Did they trash the place... Is the dog okay... Is my 'stash' still there or did they take that too? The nerves were spent... I smoked a cigarette or two.

We were greeted by two friendly, yet partially intimidating city police officers who offered us their condolences and prepared us for what we were about to see. Apparently they had already cleared the house... Which means they knew what it looked like in there "Well, your house is trashed." Commented the sergeant.

Then we entered our house....
Mass chaos.

They did trash our house... From top to bottom. The place was strewn and torn apart recklessly. There was shit everywhere... everywhere.

Shit broken - They entered through a huge window in the back of our house, smashing it to oblivion... And crushed misc. Other items in the wake of idiotic destruction. Some things sentimental and unrepairable.

Shit torn - Why they thought that was cool, I dunno. The papers never did anything to you.

Shit slashed - They found my husbands leatherman and commenced with cutting into things they couldn't open. Which was almost every fucking thing.

Shit stolen - This is a long and hurtful list. I would have been fine with you stealing my shit... Why did you have to steal from my kids though. You fucking assholes. Among the things I've lost that hurt the most? Diamond Earrings that were passed on to me through generations. My sons baby teeth (yes, the tooth fairy had kept the whole damn set), and all of my eldest sons toys (PS2, Xbox, PSP, $600 worth of games). Yep, they cleaned out my oldest sons room of loot; leaving only a bed, a dresser, and a stack of books (apparently those fuckers don't read). Color me shocked.

Shit smeared - There was dog shit all over my carpets... Smeared and ground in, thanks in part to them walking through my dogs shit outside and tracking it in with their shoes as they tore the place apart. Our house smelled like a kennel... No room was safe. By the way though, the dog was fine.

And one of those fuckers bled all over my house - I was glad to see one of them was injured from blasting through my window. But, I secretly wished that fuckstick had cut his jugular instead of his hand... I could have replaced my carpets. Besides, finding your dead body bleeding out in my driveway would have made the whole situation a positive.

So. The police processed the scene; fingerprinting, swabbing the blood, taking pictures. Husband and I sat and watched, calling the insurance company and wondering how this would impact my oldest son, who adores his Xbox.

So they caught the three ass hats that did it though. Yes, they did.
Thanks to a neighbor calling in a suspicious person, and our police department reacting right away... They were able to catch the fucks as they waited at the neighborhood bus stop. Waited at the bus stop LMAO! Jesus people, if you're gonna steal my shit at least have a fucking car handy. Three duffel bags, two laptop cases, and pockets stuffed with some of my jewelry. Idiots, seriously.

They copped a confession later... And we were able to go to the station and identify our stuff. Not all of it, since some was in evidence bags that we couldn't open until processed. So, really we don't know what we'll get back and what was lost when they tried to evade the police. Sometime next week we'll know for sure.

I was lucky to have my identification on this lap top or they would have never known it was ours and to contact us. Furthermore, we came SO close to losing this stuff forever... That means that some 16 year old would be enjoying my porn and my naked pictures of myself. K, now that would have REALLY pissed me off.

Random weird observation: These guys were not into panties, they were into socks.

So this weekend the plan is to fix and clean. We did some yesterday of course, but the house really has suffered and needs to be... Well... Cleansed. I, of course, didn't sleep well last night... Color you shocked.

I'm gonna swear about this for a long time. Because the perps were 16. Juvenile bastards... Time served will be short if any... All I can say is if I meet any of you in a dark alley, your bodies will be unidentifiable when I'm finished. Until then, you poor fucking bastards... Enjoy paying out your ass for restitution.