Voicemail
Hi! You've reached Emma and Chloe....
We can't make it to the blog right now, so please leave a shout-out after the little beepie thing, and we will return your message as soon as possible once we get back to the blog.
Thanks! and see you all very soon.
KISSES!
Chloe and Emma
posted by Everything Nice at 2:10 PM
127 Comments:
Emma, Glad to see your back ... er, you're back ... I don't see myself in the pic, wtf?
Hi Emma, this is Emma.
Is it possible that you could bring home a steak please? Maybe even a little bit of onion? You'll have to skip the wine for now though.
Oh, and I almost forgot... renew your Playboy subscription because you don't want to miss the March issue.
Thanks. Call me!
Fanstastic Picture......
Miss you guys
HI Kristen! We miss you too :)
Hi Emma and Spice - This is Thomcat, your neighbor.
I'm calling about the noise ordinance here. Can you too keep it down? It sounds like you girls are doing push-ups or thrusts. Every now and then, it sounds like one of your girls won the lottery, with all that hollering. I thought I would ask you to keep it down first, before I take this complaint to management.
Thank you!
Hi Spicy, this is Emma. I just noticed that Tequila Guy has a picture now. It distracted me so I forgot to pick up the extra lube.
Ummm, do you want me to stop one more place? Oh, and I think we've been reported to the manager for the noise... Must be our asshole neighbor. Tell him to keep his cats off our property.
Well, I'm a little confuse about things around here, but then again, I'm old. Hope all is well--sorta miss you guys...
Hi Emma and Chloe, it's Asshole Shawn. Call me, we can have hot pockets with mom and look over the next batch of article deadlines.
yowza I'm glad to see you're back to boom Emma... hope you are recovering nicely.
Everything Nicely even.
*beeeeep*
mmMMmmm...mMmmMmmm!!
MMMMM....mmmhhhmmm...MMMMMMM!!!!
*beeep*
Hey Spice and anyone else that happens to be listening to this right now.... It's Emma:
Sausage!!! Is that with special sauce? I think we were discussing that yesterday were we not? I spit my soup when you said that. Damn you for soup spitting. God love you.
HA! I love it when he neighbor decides to cum around...er come around... whatever. Good job Spice!! Tell Shawn I can't have any hot pockets, too high in sodium... I may explode.
Hi Emma, Hey Chloe it's X!
I'm calling to find out if everything is ok.
HEHEHEHE get it?
If Everything is...
Nevermind.
Soo tell me, is Shawn into older chicks?
Come on! I use your blog to try pick up guys why not your answering machine?
OK so...Call me!
*reminder to call Madame and tell her Everything is doing much better and that yes she can pick up guys on my answering machine AND my blog, as long as she reciprocates like a good girl*
Hi spice... um. k. I have to hang up and fuck you now... it was the load blowing.
Sit on my face?
I'm into older women!
No Hot Pockets for Em.
I think there's a deli just down the street that sells sausage with a special sauce filing. But I'm not going there right now because I just pitched a tent in my chino's.
Tell me Madame, have you ever slept with a man that has a penile piercing and lives with his mother?
Hi Spice, I just finished the schematics on dual face sitting but it doesn't look pretty. Perhaps we should do our stretching before hand. Don't want to pull anything important.
HI SUG! sloppy kisses!
A-W-E-S-O-M-E.
Take the ball gag out of the neighbors mouth so we can use him for our matt.
Shawn, i had no idea you had a penis piercing... but I'm impressed... not shocked, but impressed.
K, Sugar... his tongue IS pierced. And his lip, and his ears, and his nipple, and his belly button, and his... his...
dude, is there any part of your body that isn't pierced?
he he he.
I am certain that comment alone most likely raised Emma's blood pressure Chloe.
Sugarpunk I think we have an understanding. If you like Mom and piercings then you should come over for hot pockets. I only have pepperoni pizza ones left though.
Emma is taking inventory of my body piercings. That means she likes me.
Still waiting to hear back from Madame though.
Shawn,
After penile piercing I passed out so what else were you saying?
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I was going to say something shitty to you Shawn. But then I got your email. Good job.
Wait... I like Madame! She's right here!!
Yes I am, I said the mere mention of penile piercing sent me into a dead swoon!
Tongue piercing too?!?!
Holy hell, that's on my list!
Madame I was asking you if you liked men that lived with their mother. Really, it's a quality lifestyle. You will never need for anything.
Anything else after that is unimportant.
And Emma? That email was from the heart. Straight from the heart like Wisefields. I just want to say that it's really good to have you home.
Shawn...is your mom hot?
Hehehe,
OK I'm a bit tipsy sorry.
WHERE'S THE LITTLE BLACK FUZZY BOX FUCKER. If you wanna do the Wisefields thing... don't joke.
I'm holding you to it.
All right this Mommy has to do home work with the kids.
Shawn, email me!
I never thought of my mom as hot.
Getting sick about that.
Switching my mindset from mother hotness to taking both of you ladies on at the same time.
I did Thom... did you pitch a tent too?
did emma just say 'little fuzzy black box' ?
sammich?
Emma! You're back! I sooooooooooooooooo missed you!
So can you do a late entry for cock appreciation week? I wanna see the piercing! hehe Are you photogenic Shawn?
Big hugs and kisses to you Emma!
1. welcome back em
2. where did that other post go?
3. what is it with this blog and posts always disappearing?
4. EMMA'S BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*pouncesnugglehuggle*
*gasp*
ANOTHER COCK APPRECIATION WEEK?
AWESOME IDEA! Just the thing to make me feel better even! Sure, let's see if Shawn will submit a picture for us!!!
Awww Tequila girl! I missed you too!
SASS!
1. thanks lovey
2. i have no idea
3. it's a reactionary thing i think. I'm striving not to do that anymore.
4. HOLLA!!! It's PAHTAY TIME!
*pouncesbackandhugglesharder*
Awwww GROUP *pouncesnugglehuggle* (<---- Sass I SO love that LOL)
Man I missed you guys - my KY hasn't been touched in days!
Wooo let the slickness commence!
hehehe
Heya Emma!! Hi Chloe - nice to meet you!!
Em - glad to see you - really glad...
Missed your sweet little .... everything!!
Call me -- we should do lunch - ANYTHING you want!!!!
XOXOXXXXX
Hey Chloe... nice to meet your fine ass ;) And Em... It's so good to have you back! I thought about you while I was rubbing one out this morning - I hope you felt the love. teehee ;)
*kisses
kb: it's great isn't it? i get this immediate vision of a tigger hug which is just what i was going for.
emma: ante up babe it's snuggle time :)
yay for no more post deleting :)
Errr.
Shit, I AM the low down.
Furthermore, I am a hot fucker too.... we smell our own.
Ill call ya.
Yeah, NO... don't blow smoke... Because you got some nice tits workin' for ya there.
JOE - I'd like to hook ya, where do I begin?
Snavv- I missed you too :) It's good to be back in the land of the living... WAIT, my sweet little? errr FINISH THAT statement and I'll give you anything YOU want!
Murphy - jesus... you used all the memory in our answering machine!! Thanks though for leaving a message for once instead of heavy breathing.
Sullen - Just thinking about you rubbing one off has me flustered... Seriously, we need to do lunch... and each other.
Sass- Im all about the ante love, let's get it on!!!
wow.. you know, you did that same thing just the other night Murphy... only you snorted in between.
what's with that?
maybe chloe ball gagged murphy that night ...
That's enough Murph! My ear is getting all hot and wet!
Now everyone is getting it on but me! I wanna get it on!
I guess it's just one of your many trademarks that I recognized Chloe.
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HOLY FUCK, what did I miss.... TG wants to be 'done'?
Alright Tequila hottie, we're on for the Saturday Night showdown this weekend, you got any other plans than being naked and muddy? Hope not!
Thom - hi.
Chlo- so, why wasn't I informed about the ball gagging? I could have flogged!
Emma - hi.
how are you?
fair to meddling ... you ?
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Chloe - Oh yeah, the ball gag that has a smiley face on it and says "Have a Nice Day!" That's all you!
Spice - Your ass felt great last night btw. I like the way when I spoon you it just kinda goes...
BAM.
Murphy - It was the roofie... that was my idea.
Thom - meddling? Sounds neat! How does one meddle?
Meddling - to busy oneself impudently or interferingly.
hehe i'm busying myself :)
You know Thom, I busy myself all the time... feels good.
sometimes I get loud and call names to myself.... of course, it's my own... but *shrug*
it works for me.
How do you busy?
I usually stand in front of my bathroom counter, closing my eyes. Usually quiet until the finish.
But for $5.95, you can buy the video of my busying myself.
Actually I don't think...
errr....
Did I pay?... ummm...
k. i need to shush.
(checks records quietly)
You got any Tom Tom Club in that records collection?
lemme know... I like genius of love... shake my ass to it all the time.
tell me you know who tom tom club is!!!!
Emma - Oh of course I do , who doesn't!
Jesus ...
(quietly googles tom tom club)
I'm in heaveeennnnnn
with my boyfriend, my lovely boyfriend.... there's no beginning and there is no eeennnd....
Where'd my girlfriend go? I wanna do the hip-bump?
I think she is retrieving her ball gags from Murph's place.
Hmmm. She may be there for awhile then..... Where is everybody today anyway?
KISSES AND JAM!!!
What flavor Jam would that be?
Hotness is abundant here... take your pick ladies, and welcome!
(pulls hood over head)
So to save the day, have a roll in the hay.
no you say? well then we will away to stay in a place that's gay.
we'll fit right in.
Sugar - echeck
thom - take off the hood.
....down by the bay, where it feels like May, every single damn day. what do you say ? shall we walk away? no work and all play ... sounds OK ?
don't pout, shout.
you know what it's about.
I got clout.
Emma, ball gags, Dr. Seuss, pierced penises, thomcat's bathroom counter and hot pockets.... mmmmmmmmm my kind of party :D
one of my favorite all time Dr Suess books...
who flung goo on betty sue
I can't rhyme fuckabeeotch.
but, if I could, I'd be top notch.
uhh.
like my crotch?
let's drink some SCOTCH!!!
Sullen, if you do get invited to that party... sneak me in!!! I missed ya
crotches crotches crotches crotches crotches crotches crotches crotches crotches crotches crotches crotches crotches crotches crotches crotches
Crotch is such a funny word.
Who thought of crotch? Must have been a guy...
there is a park near where i live, that we call Crotch Park ... since it is basically starts in the Y in the wierd intersection.
I wanna go there...
So, with that definition out there, where does crotchety come from?
WTF?!?!
Is Murphy crocheting?
*raises hand
it's almost 3pm here... can i take part in the nooner????
WTF Emma? "Your Woman -- White Town" is my $#@#& ring tone on my cell!
(You may have had it listed for some time, but I didn't notice til today)
I LOVE that song DOM! LOVE IT!!!
I could never be your woman
Iiiii could never be your... woman
duh duh da duh duh da duh duh da duh
Nooners rock! Let's all get down!!!! Of course Sullen you can participate sheesh!!! AS IF!
Madame- Pay no attention to the bald man crocheting in the corner.... he's pissy and needs a cock sock.. so he's being dilligent. We need you here and focused!!
and why is he harboring the dictionary? Murphy gimme it!!!!
AWESOME!!! Is she a tight fit?
wow... spicey... that was fairly distracting... in a good panty-jossling sort of way.
how's your zie?
I absolutely love this blog!! You ALL are so f*&%in hot!!
Magnum - I f@#$&% love your name... why DO they call you Magnum? Is there a story behind that?
*he he i said behind*
Danny - I love breasts too. I make it as obvious as possible.
k. Murphy, it's best in these types of situations to pull from your creative mind.
It may hurt a little, but try it... I'ts sorta like sticking a finger in your ass for the first time... and you liked that, didn't you?
Spice - you have my heart... and all the other parts too.
i wear magnums.
and emma, you were right. i just read through all the shit we said on our blog today, and we are in pretty rare form. annabella was laughin' out loud at work even.
Emma! We better be on for Saturday night! I've got a place for the kid to stay so I'm all alone... or not... :) Hehe... I'm so ready to be naked and muddy!
Oh there is a reason they call me Magnum....KJ care to comment??? Hey I'm going to be in Portland, Oregon the week of the 13th....you guys want to do dinner sometime that week???
Oh there is a reason they call me Magnum....KJ care to comment??? Hey I'm going to be in Portland, Oregon the week of the 13th....you guys want to do dinner sometime that week???
Circle + Jerk. HA!
Scummy - you're nummy. bite my left ass cheek and make me giggle.
TG - Yeah, we're on! I'm so excited to see you naked and muddy!
Magnum - That was ssooo nice, you said it twice!
Jay - I like ADD, it helps in the bedroom with positional switching!
Sorry slip of the thumb!!
We could either have dinner or I could have you...either way you like it!!
Thumb slippage! HAWT! I do like it...
i do! i do!
now place your index finger right here... yeah, that place... good good. now
rub.
Me like a women who knows what she wants and how she wants it!!!
YEAH BABY! ME TOO!
So seriously...anythig that is a must do, must see, or place a must eat while I am there???
In Portland? I have no idea... oh yeah... there is this one place that have great steaks...
it's called the ringsider or something like that.... lemme check.
portland ... hey, that's where i go shopping to skip out on the sales tax here ...
Emma, what up dear? Been missing you...
em: to answer your question re where is everybody?
sick in bed all fucking day all fucking week (with minor breaks to drag myself to work)
Sales Tax is a bitch. a hot and horny bitch that doesn't give back.
spank her by shopping in Portland.
I'm telling you people, that's a travel ad waiting to happen!
Hey Goose.. I missed ya too. What up? hmmmm... my legs, in a V. Wanna play?
Jay - better yet, bedside manners AND add!?!?!?! Awesome!
gentle, yet querky.
Love to play...Want me to just dive in? Oh hell, that is like a rhetorical question with you...Pull your ass to the end of the bed....(Muffled moan, tongue insertion...)
emma, you needs to buy a wedding party thong or i'll beat you.
Glad to see you back in the saddle, Emma. That is a saddle you're sitting on isn't it?
Goose- err... what's with the muffling? I don't muffle... I moan outright.
Jay - For portland? YEah, you're right.. it could be :) I was thinking it would be a great t-shirt too.
Scum - see, now ill wear my thong and you can beat me anyway. Actually I don't like thongs... make em boyshorts and i'll play.
Shy - Hi guy. Actually I'm sitting on my sybian... how's tricks in your hat?
The moan was from me with your snatch all up in my mug...
WHOA WHOA WHOA... Wait, I missed Sass...
holy hell Sass, are you sick with that crappy virus?!?!?!?
Holy fuck poor dear... I'll be right over!
"snatch all up in my mug" did you read that?!?!?!?
snatch?
Y'know the usual thing... taming tigers, converting virgins.
What's wrong with snatch? Besides the usual things that could potentially ruin a bad experience.
Shy... virgin converting is tough dude, you have my deepest sympathies.
Snatch is what the Goose said...Sorry, it came out before I could stop...
Yeah, I'm looking for something easier... any suggestions?
Shy - how about finding some Ethiopian Fine Cuisine eateries.
Or Naked Origami without paper....
@#@*&^$&*#^$*#&
$*&#($&#*($&#*&(
#@$@%#$%$#% Memory Error!
FUCK I HATE THIS COMPUTER!!!!
Jesus woman, I actually 'heard' you !
Hey hey sug... hold the profound desires lady... I'm trying to fix my snatch...
errr computer!!!
breathing deeply... in out in out
I'm getting this pithy error when I connect. Something with a lot of numbers and it's very confusing.
I am saying your name... breathy even, like a low growel.
I know.. I wanna fucking toss the fucker out the fucking window to it's fucking demise.
but I'm breathing heavy and I'm perspirated!
HEY! Did I tell you Chlo? I got a new laptop?!?!? Remember the clunky thing I had?
this one is streamline and sexy as hell. Just like yours truly.
no seriously, it's hot!
LOL at Sugarpunk... eat my posso.
I eat posso!! I think ...
I am a vagitarian after all Sug.
So that means Tequila Guy and I got something in common.
em: huggles (with a face mask *grin*)
i'll just curl up in the corner and enjoy the uh... byplay
*snerk*
awww I LOVE YOU SASSINAK!!! Even willing to do that snarky grin behind the face mask!!!
you are near and dear to my heart baby, I really hope you feel better.
I will dedicate it to you even!
Emma, incoming communication from Shy... please check e-mail...
And I'm tossing the baskets... didn't work... hard to weave with these big, thick gloves on!
Vagitarian ... why didn't I think of that? wtf
K, you know Chloe... I seem to think I've done that. Love the facial expressions from the co-workers.
Shy - I will check and respond forthwith! Tossing baskets... sounds loverly... better than converting virgins!
Tequila Guy - Well, I mean... leave it up to me! I can teach you all sorts of trix!
ummm. MESH THONG?
That's birth control right there.
yeah, can you imagine the visual of smushed beans and franks in that poor thong?
bad bad, just bad.
Hello, hello, is the teacher in?
Tie your hair back, babe, ... or, ah, tie my hands back, babe, ... ah, eh, do what you want ...
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